Wednesday, 16 January 2008

TWAT : The War Against Terror

There now follows a short lesson in the use of CAPITAL LETTERS to carry a debate in absence of facts and evidence:

In memory of Tony Blair I've decided to join TWAT and do my bit to publish some bloated hot air and hyperbole in the name of protecting YOUR freedom and the freedom of THE ENTIRE WESTERN WORLD.

When I say ENTIRE WESTERN WORLD I am including Indian democracy and similar, also Saudia Arabia although it's ruled by a despotic monarchy and Pakistan even though it's ruled by a military dictator. There are lots of dictators on our side but that's ok because they are the GOOD DICTATORS, they're helping us.

By the end of the 10's (31st December 2019), everyone, including the families of suicide bombers, will have had at least one friend or relative killed by a terrorist. That's a FACT and that includes YOU. In the last 20 years the amount of oil extracted and refined in the world has steadily increased and will continue to do so for another 30 years. Oil is the only commodity whose price goes up as supply increases. That is why it is absolutely critical that we DO NOT capture Osama Bin Laden, the global arms trade may never recover from the loss of such a villian.

This is what TWAT is all about. Our audience is the TV generation, we need to bring more horrors and threats to the screen every day if we are going to get ratings and votes. In the future we will have to make video games more explicit and bloody so that people can't really tell the difference when when they see the collateral damage news footage.

Again, WE CONDEMN all forms of non-democratic rule; except in Saudi Arabia, Pakistan, Kuwait and certain other countries. We fought a war to keep Kuwait in the control of the Kuwati royal family, that should be a clear signal to the world. WE restored that MONARCHY without even a hint of discussion about creating a democracy once the Tyrant Saddam Hussain had disposed of the Kuwati dictators.

TWAT is coming; to wipe out selected enemies of democracy. 28 days delivery includes postage and packing, offer does not apply to friends or relatives of poor countries like Tibet, they will be aided by certain Hollywood personalities and/or Richard Gere, subject to availability and appearance fees.

Fetch the gattling gun George my boy! there's doin's a-foot!


JJ

3 comments:

Daphne Wayne-Bough said...

Oh ... you mean there wasn't really a security threat in Brussels on New Year's Eve? We were deprived of fireworks in the name of democracy and firemen's union rights? And because it was Brussels' turn?

JolietJake said...

not really, I meant we shouldn't change our plans around these terrorist threats. That's what they want us to do.

The Aunt said...

Excellent!